190516 #100Days

Day Seven. Well look at meee! That's a week!


Instead enjoy this baby fox: https://i.redd.it/3hyt47cf3bu21.jpg

Instead I wanted to write down my personal experience with three dating apps. I used and still use Tinder, Bumble and OkCupid. I should probably clarify first that I live in Germany, I am a heterosexual male and I was always just looking for a serious relationship. But if there's anything I learned on the ten dates with eight women I've been on this year, it's that it's better to just figure out if you like each other first and worry about what kind of relationship it's going to be later.
All those eight lovely and very different women (all between 20 and 30) were nice, calm and we always had a good time. I invited two of them for a second date and both respectfully declined. Another two asked me for a second date and we had a nice second date and at the very least I think I have gained two new friends. idk. maybe more in the future. The other four were uninterested in me and I felt the same.


I've been on Tinder for a while now and I fucking hate it. The app is buggy as fuck, people are boring and the gamification aspect drives me crazy. It is way to simple to get more matches and was to fun to swipe left and right, than actually take the time to write to somebody, give them their full attention and focus. It is very unpersonal, in the last six months no more than five women ever wrote to me - that must be out of idk. maybe 250 matches? Most women on Tinder seem very unattractive to me, way too many shitty instagram beauty filters. Almost nobody has a profil description, so even if you get a match you really can't write anything personal to start a conversation unless they have some interesting pictures. I feel like
I recently purchased Tinder gold for a month, just because it kept telling me that I still have so many likes that I haven't matched back. - Turns out! Literally all of them are weird spam accounts like 3000 km away. So that wasn't worth the money.


Basically Tinder, but you can personalize your profile a bit more. But mots important: Women HAVE to write first. Then you HAVE to respond. Both in 24 hours. If either doesn't happen you automatically get unmatched. This simple feature makes this so much better than Tinder because it actually creates conversations. Some still just write "Hi". I usually just unmatch those because we would just be wasting each others time. But when a woman sparks a conversation and actually seems interested we would almost always end up on a date. Not that many users though.


This one's different. And I think I like it? You can still swipe left and right, but you don't have to wait for a match. Everybody can write to everybody at any time. You can do quite elaborate searches, based on location, interest, age, looking for, and many others. The app recommends people to you by calculating a score in %. You increase the accuracy by answering as many out of a never ending list of question as you want. Usually these questions are quite easy to answer (Yes/No) but you can add a comment or explanation to any answer you want. Questions are really about any kind of topics, you can skip any question you don't want to answer.
And let's be honest. It's really just a bunch of silly questions. There is only one way to get to know a person and that is in person. So one shouldn't care too much about this. But it's interesting to brows through somebody's answers and see where you agree and disagree. But it's usually even more interesting to look someones profile. Now. Building that profile will take time, especially if you want it to be good. But in my opinion this is by far the best aspect of okc.
All three people I have written with for more than a day on this platform, I have met in person and one is a good friend of mine now. I do have like 30 matches that haven't written me and I haven't found the time. So there is that gamification tinder problem again where the app wants you to find new people but doesn't really encourage you enough to engage with your matches. But I guess that's also due to my current laziness. I think I have online dating burnout. So I've been taking a small break from all this madness. Okc will stay on my iPhone though. That's for sure.

There are many other things I learned about dating. And people. Most will probably sound obvious to you. But I am a freshly born kitten caught in the Hurricane of Dating. See you tomorrow.

You'll only receive email when captain of my soul publishes a new post

More from captain of my soul